The Magic of Pets

When my cat died on March 20th, I stopped blogging entirely. The only reason you’ll see I posted blogs on that particular date (and after) is because I always schedule my blogs about 1-2 weeks ahead.

I would like to let you all know that I have been reading every single comment left on this blog – even if I never replied. Your comments have been little sparks of light in the darkness. Thank you too, for all the lovely, heartfelt emails and for being so understanding and sharing in my grief when I posted about losing Sven last month.

I’m not embarrassed to admit, that I, the ever optimistic happy go-lucky crazy cat lady, finally reached the end of her tether after my pet died. And we should not be ashamed of feeling sad. If we do, we help perpetuate the stigma of depression that stops people reaching out for help.

It’s okay to ask for help. It’s okay to let others know that you’re not coping well.

For me, I think the problem was, no matter how lousy I was feeling, my dog and cat would always be there for me, so to lose one of my constant companions has been absolutely devastating. I have never needed Sven more than I need him now, yet he’s lost to me forever.

I usually feel pretty happy most of the time, but when Sven died, any sparks of happiness vanished along with him. It took a few weeks before I could look at a sunrise and feel that rush of appreciation and contentment I used to feel. But even then, I knew that something was still not right.

I think I recognised I was getting to a point where I couldn’t handle the grief any longer. I needed some cats around to force me to laugh. I mean… how can you not laugh when you see a face like this??

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Sven had fangs. I’m still not sure if this is normal or if I really had a vampire cat all along.

I also used to love how chummy my dog would get with her cat friends… in particular, she bonded quickly with my first cat Moet, but also loved giving Sven kisses too.

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After much thought (or perhaps none at all lol), I decided to adopt two adult rescue cats, Hugo & Boss (originally Squiggy and Ritchie), who have been waiting for a home for three long years with Purrfect Match Cat Adoptions.

I wanted to adopt them not only because they had been waiting for so long, but because Lesley Inkson, the director of Purrfect Match, had said “they are the most delightful of cats. They are great all-rounders and I’m really sad they have been overlooked for so long. The rest of their siblings found homes as kittens. They are smoochy, purry, playful and clean and easy to please. Bonded brothers to go together. Great with kids, cats and dogs.”

When I went to view them at the shelter, I watched Boss jump clear into a mirror. After we stopped laughing, I just knew… Hugo & Boss were always supposed to be mine.

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Hugo & Boss eating their cat grass

The day I brought them home was the day I started writing and blogging again. It’s never been more clear to me now that pets really are magic for the soul. Yes, it hurts terribly when they leave us, but when they are a part of our lives, they make you smile and can drag you out of the house and force you to socialize (and clean up their poo when they miss the litter tray). No wonder they say dog and cat owners are happier than those without.

Pets can give you a reason for being. A reason for laughing. A reason for loving. And all you have to do is open your heart.

I still don’t feel quite the same, but I think that’s natural as I’m still grieving. Hopefully one day soon I’ll be back to my cheery, happy self. In the meantime, I am so eternally grateful to Hugo & Boss for ending my drought of creativity and giving me so much love!

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Settling in to their new home

It’s never been clearer that I need both a dog and a cat(s) in my life to feel happy and whole. Okay… so I also wouldn’t mind a handsome knight on a white horse to come and rescue me, but that’s probably because I’m a hopeless romantic.

If you would like to donate to Purrfect Match Cat adoptions, please visit their campaign page over at YouCaring.

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84 thoughts

  1. Very sorry reading of Sven. I lost my longtime loyal cat companion in March as well and miss him terribly. Finally managed to blog about my sadness of it. Months have passed and I still feel a hole in the universe without him. Glad to hear of your finding Boss and Hugo.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Wow! You spoke just right from my heart! It’s so nice to see that there are people who feel the same kind of appreciation for and happiness by the presence of all those gold-hearted animal-companions of ours! Wishing you all the best with Hugo&Boss!<3

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I’m so glad you have new angels in your life. I’m sorry for your deep loss. I had my own two losses, but I also have two new adopted fur-babies (dogs), so it eases the pain a little. Lots of heartfelt thoughts going out to you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah me too – we always had a few cats around when I was as little! We actually never had any dogs growing up, but now we have about 4 between us all – and 2 new additions hopefully coming soon! Funny how things work out 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Hiya!! I would love for you to check out my blog when you have some time as I feel we are pretty likeminded! I am completely in agreement with this entire post…pets, cats especially, are magical creatures indeed!
    justagirlandhercat596359289.wordpress.com

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I love how much your pets mean to you! I love hearing stories about cats and their people!Back in October I found myself wandering around the Cat Depot (my local cat shelter) watching the cuties play. Next thing you know I brought home pet #3. She’s a 15 yr old tabby with renal problems. I just fell in love with her though. I could feel our connection right there in the shelter. In the midst of all the other cats swirling around us, it was if we were the only ones in the room. I had to bring her home. Now, 7 months later, she runs the house. The quiet, sad, and shy cat I found at the shelter, is now a happy, confident, and demanding, cat that stares at me expectantly for attention the moment I walk through the door. I’m so happy that she is happy. I know our time together will be short lived because of her age, but I couldn’t be happier than I am with her here. I think that from now on I will likely always adopt a senior cat. The funny thing about cats is how they make you feel so good by letting you love them and dote on them. It’s like they know it is a privilege to have them, and it is.

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  6. I’m so glad to see that you have taken a step in a direction of healing. It’s hard ~ and no one can tell you when you are done grieving, but it definitely helps to have other fur balls around. When I lost my Apollo, I still had another cat, Molly. But she was stand-offish, where Apollo wasn’t happy if he wasn’t touching you constantly (even if it was just his tail across your lap). It was difficult to imagine another cat in the house, but I needed another cuddly cat to help take away a little of the emptiness Apollo left behind. Having two new baby boy kitties helped distract me from my pain (most of the time) and helped me to laugh again at their shenanigans. I still miss my boy (3 years later) and I know there will never be another cat in my life like him. The new boys will never take his place, but they absolutely fill some of the hole in my heart and I’m glad they are there. I’m glad you are writing again and I’m glad your new babies are helping you heal.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I know what you mean – some of our cats leave an indelible impression on us, you have other cats, but each cat is an individual.I am so glad that you were able to give home to two other cats.

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  7. So nice of you to adopt these cats. I’ve lost my cats many years ago, and I still feel that feeling of a needle in the chest when I’m reminded of them. I functioned on automatic pilot and lost weight, could hardly sleep. I’d walk into a room and forget what I was looking for. I once froze in the middle of the street and turned completely numb, not knowing where I was or what I was doing there. It was awful, like being in a constant fog.

    I have three feral cats in my house now. I had to go back to normal.My pets are the best thing that had ever happened to me. How I hate it when people say, “It’s just a cat. Buy a new one. Get over it.” Like I’ve lost a piece of furniture. So sorry for your loss. Glad you’re doing better now.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. A heartfelt post, I empathise with your pain. We lost our sweat and soft ragdoll when he was only two and Jasper still hasn’t been seen since bonfire night.
    The house is awful empty without a cat, even with two children and a dog. I’m still hoping Jasper comes home, so I daren’t replace him.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Hi there. The first cat I ever had died in 2001 & I may never forgive myself for not making sure she was inside the house before I left that day. (We’re pretty sure she was hit by a car, but she was still alive when we got home.). I still feel the pain, but the only help was to get another cat—TWO of them! New cat is the BEST solution. 😃

    Liked by 2 people

  10. I had a pet sparrow many moons ago. Never put her into cage but used to feed and bathe her daily and my dad made a small nest-house on our roof-top. One day, she gone forever, leaving me devastated.

    Never dared enough to have pets since then. Instead, I make a small, monthly financial contribution in our local animal rescue shelter, to satiate my nurturing instinct.

    Your love for these adorable fur-babies shines through every line. May they live long and prosper. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  11. It is always a heartbreak when we lose our animal companions. Although you are happy with you new cats, it doesn’t mean that you will forget you old beloved cat.Each claims a special place in your heart- cats and dogs are not interchangeable they have their own personalities. People who tell you ‘it was just a cat – or ‘so get another one’ have no idea how much their comments hurt. I wrote about this in a post on my blog a while back called ‘A Fool for Love’ Our animals know that are loved and the hardest thing is to let them go- when it is time. I’m so glad that you were able to adopt Hugo & Boss- and I am sure that after three years in a shelter they really appreciate it too.May you have many happy years together!

    Liked by 3 people

  12. Aww, love this!! Pets can definitely bring a sense of comfort and peace. I am a cat lover as well and mine has always been my little cuddle buddy and comforter. We have two cats now as well and they have bonded like brother and sister. Happy you found a way through your grief and adopting those two beautiful cats is wonderful. They look so cute and happy in their new home. Glad you have gotten back to writing and sharing about it.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Thank you Melissa 🙂 You have two cats as well!! How do you go with kitty litter trays? I’ve read somewhere that you should have a kitty litter for every cat plus one extra – does that actually work?? lol. Hugo and Boss are settling in well, they are soooo cute 🙂

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      1. Well so far they have been doing okay with one litter tray, it’s big enough for both of them and I clean it out everyday, haven’t had any issues with smell or messes out of the box. I’d go with what you feel is best. Glad they are settling in well!

        Liked by 1 person

  13. A week or so ago I wrote an entire blog post about my dog and cat that I had when I was a kid. They’ve been gone a long time but one day I really missed them. I hadn’t thought about them in a while but all of a sudden there they were playing like they always did in my memory.

    I found some old photos, wrote up a long post about them and felt really happy afterwards. Maybe it was their way of reminding me that we shared time together. Or maybe they just wanted to stop by and say hi. Whatever it was I’m glad they did.

    Sven is the same. One day, years from now, he’ll stop by just like my dog and cat and say hello. You may do as I did and write up an entire post about him. If you do, I promise, you will have a surge of happiness run through you.

    I’ve been thinking about you and I am happy to hear you are doing well and even happier to see the new addition to your family.

    Welcome back!!!!

    Liked by 5 people

    1. I just got all teary eyed reading this… I lost my first cat, Moet, a few years ago when he ran outside during a storm and disappeared forever. I was very bonded to him and the worry I felt for him was such a prolonged agony – yet I never blogged about it. It just feels like this huge unresolved mess. Memories of Moet occasionally stop by, and sometimes I think I might be forgetting him – until I bring up all of his old photos. (Then I remember how he used to sleep with his mouth open, how he would run around the house playing with the dog…) Oh my heart… I think the reason why your comment really hit a chord, is because I know one day Sven will also slowly fade from memory… and I’m just sad knowing that it’s inevitable. I wanted him to be with me forever, just not as a memory. He’ll always be there though as you said, nudging at my heart strings at random moments. I’m looking forward to the time when I can look back fondly on all the awesome memories he left behind. I think that’s why it really helped blogging about it, I wanted to show him how much I loved him… by not forgetting him, not ever. And so, in a few years time, there he will be, on my blog waiting.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I honestly feel, years from now, Sven will pay you a visit the way Copper and Morris did to me.

        When you read about them on my blog I don’t think I was writing it, they were. Those memories I wrote I hadn’t thought about in years. The night before I wrote it I dreamt I was a kid again. Copper chased the train, my grandfather laughed and Morris jumped on Coppers back.

        Years from now – 10 or 20 years you may wake up and remembe things you haven’t thought of in years and the guilty party was Sven. He came by to say hi.

        That’s what they do. They never leave us and I’m glad.

        Liked by 1 person

  14. Hugo and Boss are beautiful!! I’m so sorry you lost Sven. This is only the second post I’ve read of yours and I can completely understand where you are coming from. I think whenever we go through any deep despair it can be hard to write or blog but having animals or in my case it’s my children and husband, they can help you rise up out of that place of darkness. I haven’t had a dog or cat in many years and I’m longing for a puppy so badly and if I ever get one it will be through adoption. Glad to see you are healing and writing again. I look forward to future blogs as you fall more in love with your cats.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Thank you! It’s amazing how your pets (or family!) can help you out of the darkness 🙂 I hope you get to adopt that rescue puppy one day. Getting my cavalier, Poppy, was one of the best things I ever did.

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  15. I know how you feel – I live alone, no relatives, just me and I had a canary. I work from home so that little bird was the love of my life, my little beacon here while I worked. He had a stroke on 12/02/16 and I had to have him euthanized. If I was to read this post I wrote, I would tear up. It has been very difficult and I will not get another pet because it is way too painful. My sympathies in the loss of your pet – I know how you feel. https://lindaschaubblog.net/2016/12/04/forty-feathered-friends-at-the-footbridge/

    Liked by 3 people

  16. I think I understand your grief– though I cannot say I know how it feels, entirely. Pets truly are a blessing from God, and I have found that while it pains us when they pass away, Christ is unfailing and will always see us through every change and loss. *That* is something to always be grateful for. ❤ Thank you for this blog!

    Liked by 2 people

  17. Milly, so sorry to hear about your loss. Losing a pet is incredibly brutal, having been through it many times myself throughout my childhood. My thoughts are with you. Glad you were able to write about it and share your grief – so many of us draw inspiration from you. Keep going!

    Liked by 3 people

  18. If I could add a photo, I would show you the five puppies my friend who breeds Shiba Inus has just had ❤
    I hate that I can't have a dog in my apartment, I feel like part of me is missing. So much so that sometimes I swear I could see those big brown eyes staring up at me, feel the head on my pillow.

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  19. It’s always rubbish when pets die, utterly rubbish. Your cat was ace, and had ace fangs. Your cat will always affect your life for the better, and the love you shared, and still share, will carry on making you a better person for the duration.

    Your new cats are super lovely! I trust they are suitably crazy, as all respectable cats are.

    Liked by 2 people

  20. I’m still not over the death of my dog 2 years later, and I dread the day I have to say goodbye to my cat. Thank you so much for sharing with us. I’m excited to hear more about your new fur babies.

    Liked by 3 people

  21. So beautifully said Milly. Our little ones get into our hearts and there’s no stopping them. Hugo and Boss sound like perfect additions to your heart. I know you will still hurt because you lost Sven. Just let your little ones remind you that everything will be alright. And in time it will. Be good to yourself.

    Lee

    Liked by 3 people

  22. Great names! It’s so hard losing a pet. It is devastating as they are part of the family. I’m so happy you have given two adult cats a lovely forever home and it breaks my heart when no one has adopted cats for that long in a shelter. We adopted our lovely cat about 6 years ago and he’d been at the shelter for just over a year I think. I dread the day he leaves us but until then we will cuddle and love him unconditionally every day and you’re right, pets really are magic for the soul! Anna xx (one half of the Cinnamon Buns and Roses blog)

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  23. Haha, LOVE their names.

    Although it has been decades since I’ve had a pet of my own (I simply don’t have the time to devote to another life form who would really be dependent on me), I love animals. I’m thankful my baby sister has had dogs, and they (the dogs) seem to love me too.

    Grief is always hard, but you’re on your way to healing. Hugo and Boss will help you on that journey. May it be a smooth one.

    Liked by 3 people

  24. Hugo & Boss look lovely. When my tom cat Orlando passed after being with me for 17 years I said I wouldn’t get another cat, but I couldn’t shake off the feeling of the house being empty. Then a mother cat and her kitten appeared in my garden, I invited them in and sat up with them for a couple nights, can’t imagine being without them now.

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  25. Sorry for your loss. When I lost my cat back in November I was devastated. It’s so hard to let them go, but at least you have lots of happy memories to hang on to.

    Welcome back and congrats on the new additions! I got a new kitty about a month after Nooch passed away and it’s really helped with the healing process. They are adorable!

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  26. My car is getting older and had some medical issues, he has shimmied down a lot so I am worried he is on his way out, but just makes me want to cuddle him more. I have lived with cats my entire life.

    I am happy you have new fire babies in your life. They look to be the sweetest things too. I hope your pup isn’t too upset.

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  27. When I first moved into my apartment I hated coming home to emptiness. Adopting my dog, Bear, was the best thing I could have done. He is a happy 2 1/2 year old fur ball and the best running buddy.

    I’m glad you were able to give homes to the brothers and I am sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is never easy. Thinking about the ones I’ve lost still makes me tear up a bit. Glad you are writing again.

    Liked by 3 people

  28. Hugo and Boss are beautiful. Adopting adult pets brings its own special joys and a very unique bond. I wish you many happy years with them. I’m sorry for your loss and I hope your spark comes back soon. Our fur friends are always with us.

    Liked by 3 people

  29. Sorry to hear about your loss. Always hard to lose a beloved pet. Back in 2009 when my first cat Cha-Cha, a girl, passed on in January after 12 years it took me until March to realize I needed to hear a meow. So at that time, we adopted a boy cat who we named Sid. He is a darling and he too had fangs until one day being naughty he parted with one fang so he continues to be a half vampire now and at present is 13. Of course, to this very day, Sha-Cha is not forgotten and I still get misty eyed seeing her photos. Blessings to you.

    Liked by 2 people

  30. Thank you for your blog it reminded me if when we lost Molly to old age just over a year ago and the house felt empty. Then I rehomed two cats that had been in a house with 18 others. They had fleas and worms and it turned out the female, Gracie, was pregnant. She had 4 kittens, two boys and two girls. They were all re homed. Now Gracie and Seamus her brother are happily with us. I hope your new cats can help give you some if that joy back you have lost. X

    Liked by 4 people

  31. Soon after the old woman up the road died, a calico cat showed up in our yard. She was so skinny, we called her Twiggy. Ironically, she was pregnant. Seven kittens later, we called the vet to have her fixed. The vet told us to wait, “She won’t get pregnant in January,” she said.

    She didn’t know Twiggy. Now we have another batch of seven.

    They all live in the shed with Scooter, our dog, and are the best of friends.

    Liked by 3 people

  32. I’m so glad two wonderful cats found their forever home with you! They look adorable and so content.

    I don’t mind admitting that one of the reasons I took on a second dog at a time when I was very ill was that I was fairly certain once Sinta goes, I will be paralysed by grief. Halla being here will force me out of the house and she will be a furry shoulder the cry on. Our pets keep us going even at the worst of times.

    Liked by 3 people

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